What is normal? How do you define it? What would you call normal? The dictionary definition is as follows:
nor·mal/ˈnôrməl/
| Adjective: |
| |
| Noun: |
| |
| Synonyms: |
adjective. regular - standard - ordinary - common - usual
noun. perpendicular
| |
Even within the recorded definition, there is no definition of what is the standard, or what the usual is. The meaning must then lie in the connotation. In other words, the meaning varies on not only the use of the word, but on the person using the word. So why is it that the general public clings to the idea of normalcy? Not consistency, but normalcy. Consistency I can see, with ever changing lives, the constant is what we embrace. On the other hand, the idea of normal does not. It merely re-establishes the idea of you are different, therefore, you are worthless - you are weird (and in the case of the cold war, it meant you were the enemy).
Weird. What is it about the word that sends most people running in the opposite direction or cowering from judgmental stares? Hasn't it been established that many famous and successful people were different from the "norm" - how else would they have managed to achieve more than all the ordinary folk? Must characteristics of the ability to exercise the frontal cortex of the brain be defined as abnormal? I always thought we should celebrate the ability to think on a higher level than neanderthals and airheads as a good thing... After all, weird is my normal.
I am weird. I associate with weird people. And the appearance of "normal" - as many others put it - is weird to me. So I embrace the term. Yes, a part of that was getting over my shyness and learning not to mind when people stare or that what other people think should not have such weight on me - essentially embracing who I am and rolling along with confidence. But finding people who are weird like me just opens up an entirely new manner in which to explore my weirdness. It's almost as if I've been given the opportunity to find out just how weird I am.
And trust me, I am most definitely weird, quirky, silly, odd... Yeah, they all pretty much apply to me (many times in affectionate ways ^_^). And it's the greatest personality boost I could have. Had I rejected it, I doubt I would be able to accept myself in my own mind. But since I have, I now can worry about all that other stuff, like the future or what not... not that I want to talk about it now... So yes, now that you understand that I label myself as weird, let me elaborate as to why that is.
So aside from my general nerdy-ness, which contributes to a large amount of my oddness, I tend to be quite quirky in other ways. A huge quirk is my tendency of mentioning things in conversation which appears quite random to others, because of course they don't live in my head. As conversations go, tangents are many times the ways that conversations progress. For me, often times they tangents just occur naturally in my thought process, leading me to conclusions that I feel need to share with others. And without a recap of my own thoughts, my presentation of ideas is quite out of nowhere. I might even zone out of a conversation while I follow my own tangent, and in turn I cause an even greater deal of confusion to my listeners. This also occurs in those silences that pop, and my odd comments tend to start conversations just because they are so weird.
Now, not everyone is boggled by my thoughts. My close friend Yoshi and I often have these sorts of conversations where, had you been listening, you would not comprehend how we even managed to have one (basically our thoughts were so in sync we need not actually speak them to understand each other). Due to the fact that my thoughts are speeding around at a million miles an hour, it usually tends to be easier to simply say my comments, and then face the music than to start with the explanations (I've lost a lot of people's interest that way). And when I try to keep up with my thoughts, I many times say things incorrectly, resulting in a meaning vastly different from what I had intended. Ultimately, it means I must think about what I say before I allow it past my lips. But given the effort that requires, it pretty much doesn't happen.
Another aspect of myself that I realize garners most of the general public's disbelief, is my habit of embracing my inner child. When I say this, I not only refer to the occasional outburst of childish mannerisms, but also my super energetic or argumentative states of being. Where I get this energy, I know not. Why I refuse to back down from the most infantile of arguments is beyond me. All I know is that sometimes I feel that my thoughts are more easily expressed in a not-quite-my-age manner. A habit that has most definitely been exacerbated by the childish behavior of my roommate (who I am excited to say has been inspired by me to start her own blog! ^_^). In fact, we often baffle our third roommate with our random antics, which are also occasionally inspired from her wonderfully colorful reactions to them - just think of a WTF facial expression and that's her.
An oddity I often observe in myself, that I also sometimes question, is my convoluted sense of perfection and order. I rearrange the furniture in the apartment, why? Because it needs to suit my delicate sense of balance. When I'm serving food, I will make sure to dish out perfectly equal portions. And I may even insist on serving the food to ensure that the proportions are just right (i.e. pasta to sauce ratio) or that the wrap has been bundled properly. And the silverware drawer? Well, let's just say that all the spoons are separated by size. But given the fact that all the forks are in one slot, it's alright if they aren't placed neatly in separate stacks by everyone else. I'll just fix it when I open the drawer (something that invariably happens when I return home). Even when it comes to my dance costume, if things aren't sitting just right, I find that my dancing also ends up suffering for it. On the other hand, I find that due to my laziness, I will let many things go into disrepair or chaos (just look at my room some days) but I'll be fine with it. As long as the piling of clothes is just right. What gets super weird is when I begin correcting things for others... but as this post is already getting super lengthy, I'll just save that for another day. It really all boils down to my super controlling personality. If it doesn't fit what's in my head, I will fidget until I get the opportunity to fix it.
The last point, that I think fits in a category of major oddness, is part of who I am: something that I had to learn to be proud of. Basically, it's being Indian (something addressed in Yoshi's recent post). On the occasion that I was wearing Indian garb or eating Indian, as long as I was with other Indians, I did not mind. But when I had to eat the Indian food my mother packed me for lunch or walk around dressed as an Indian, I found I very much minded. Why? Because it was the few jerks who would speak up and say, "what are you doing? Ewww, that's weird." Sure it was because of ignorance. But when you are a child, who gave them the right to make any child feel ashamed about who they are? Thankful, when I made genuine friends, I learned that more people are fascinated with such a unique culture they have not been exposed to than the jerks who despise that very individuality, and dismiss it as weird. And in embracing that, I learned to accept myself in the ways that I am actually weird.
In the end, I am weird and I love it. I associate with people who, though they may occasionally laugh at my actions, are just as weird as I in their own ways. It boils down to the fact that there really is no such thing as a defining umbrella of normal. Anyone who acts as such is hiding the quirky, weird parts of themselves: hiding their true nature from those they call friends. And I feel sorry for them. Because being weird is like being free, and enjoying the adventures and trails you walk down the way they were meant to be enjoyed - by being you.
To the weird in me that I shall never part with, 'cuz when you're with me, the skies will always be blue:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uzAWDG3ZieM&feature=related
P.S.: Since I never actually addressed the title (and the fact that I had not had been brought up), and many of you are probably wondering what connection it even has. Basically the comment came out of nowhere, and much like one of my own comments, was a complete shift out of the universe of our conversation. Granted the speaker had actually observed the mentioned yams, but the comment had left us quite speechless with laughter for the next five minutes or so.
Also, please forgive the shift in tone of this post. I had been listening to quite a bit of morbid music originally, and changed mid post, when I realized I had completely abandoned the brevity I had originally planned the post would contain.
No comments:
Post a Comment